That Body.

That Belly You Dream Of...

Okay we all have dreams of having that perfect body and have everyone staring at us in wonder, so I thought I'd write a post about why I want this body so much and how much I crave the attention I've never received in my life so far. Also I'll be talking about the kind of body I'm after.

First of all the dream body, how much I've craved that beautifully flat stomach that's slightly toned and shows your curves, that is the stomach I'll be aiming for, the only hard part doing the right exercises to get it. But that has been solved as well as I have an app that shows me all the different exercises and how to do them, so I can't wait to use that when I'm at the gym.

The thighs and arms are my worst area's as my thighs are no riddled with stretch marks which I shall be buying bio-oil for and hopefully see less of them, I shall hopefully lose a good few inches on those bad boys. As I do detest them, and myself for letting this happen in the first place. The arms another sour spot for me because I just generally hate how large they look and want a nice trimmed look to them.

Then you have the clothes and the attention, I know that the fashion industry will always design for the skinnier person, so that's another reason I want to get skinny, not only for the health benefits but for the clothes that would never look right on a larger person. I know it seems like I hate large people, as I don't. I just hate me as a larger person, it isn't who I want to be.

I also never had the kind of attention most girls got when they started developing etc. Which makes me feel like I must have done something wrong, well hopefully this will change, with my changes I shall hopefully start attracting more guys, it seems odd that I want attention but it's just to boost my self-esteem. I also want to do it for my boyfriend, as I don't want to be holding hands with him thinking that he may be ashamed of how I look, I know he'd never ever think that of me, but I think that of myself.

So hopefully with this hard work and lots of motivation and support and action, I will reach that goal I am so desperate to reach. I know this is a marathon and not a race, so I need to pace myself but the excitement is just getting to me already. I just wish the new year would hurry up and get here so I can get on with it.

Here are a few pictures just to give you a rough idea of how I wouldn't mind looking, pretty nice aren't they?

Happy New Year, The Diet Will Begin.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

All right everyone, I hope you have an amazing New Year which is only a couple days away and I thought I'd post this just in case I can't get online in time. As I'm lacking in internet as my house, we don't even have a house phone we just live through our mobiles. 

Okay, as you know I'll be starting my strict diet and exercise routine for the New Year. I've had a look at the calendar and my first proper exercise day shall be Wednesday 2nd January. On the 1st I shall be going through all my old clothes and throwing away everything that is too small for me and keeping the basic clothes that fits me. Sounds strange but I won't be going on a shopping spree either, no. I shall keep this horrible 12 - 14 sized clothes and wait until I've started losing weight before I buy anything else, that way I have more reasons to motivate myself. 

I won't be losing weight just to look good but to be able to dress good, which is good because not only will I be saving loads of money due to no clothes shopping but also it gives me so much money to spend on new clothes when I do get there.

My aim is to lose roughly 1.16lb every week, seems a bit small I know but I am extremely unfit and don't want to push my body too much at the beginning. I shall be doing this diet for roughly 6 months enough time to get fit by the end of my last college year. So hopefully I'll start size 12 - 14 and end size 8 and 2st lighter.

Rules To My NEW Routine:

1. No junk food at all, except a small square of dark chocolate (Only 1 a day, if desperate)
2. Exercise 3 times a week at the gym (Monday, Wednesday and Friday)
3. Use my workout DVD's once a week (Saturday or Sunday)
4. Go for a walk for roughly 30mins once a day if possible.
5. Replace and organise my meals, to improve every part of my diet and eat more fruit and veg.
6. Start walking my dogs more, for longer periods of time.
7. Begin drinking the proper amount of water that everyone is supposed to. (8 Cups)
8. Constantly motivate myself to go jogging and get over my fear of running in public.
9. Aim high and lose more weight than planned.
10. Keep going, even when the target weight is reached don't stop what I'm doing.

Let me know what you all think of this, as I'm not sure if I'm being too harsh on myself or not harsh enough. I know losing weight is going to be tough and honestly there will be times I want to give up, I just have to remember that I'm doing this for myself and that no one can take this away from me except myself.

Now on a more jolly note, please have a good New Year, drink a bit too much and just enjoy every moment. After all we survived the apocolaypse, who knew.

Tension's For The New Year.

It's That Time Of Year...

It's the most wonderful time of year of course, and this couldn't be a worse time to consider losing weight. I have decided to cut myself some slack and after all it is Christmas, and it only comes once a year. Plus I don't want to put a pooper on anyone else's day. 

As you know I'll be starting my extreme diet at the beginning of the year, and it's going to be tough. I'll need all the support I can get which is limited but still there, I will really have to push myself and make sure I work extremely hard all the time. This is a time for a fresh start and you'll all be going through it with me every step of the way. 

I shall be updating you about how often I go gym and even what I've been eating and what support I'm getting and so much more. I will also be keeping track of my confidence levels along the way, and if this works for me then maybe it'll inspire you to the same. 

'Just remember, you can do anything if you put your mind to it.'

It's not going to be easy and you may even see me relapse into some old habits but let's just hope and pray that things go to plan and I can work through this and make myself size 8 after 6 months. Long time I know, but I didn't want to be too unrealistic, so I will have to push myself and get over some confidence issues I have. You never know I may become a full pledged runner after this, if I can get over running in public.

Wish me luck everyone and enjoy the song, write again soon. Oh, I almost forgot.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! 

Un-expected Weight Gain.

I did my first weigh-in today for the first time in a long time and with a little surprise but mostly annoyance I have gained weight.

I went from 150.1 lbs to 151.6 lbs, the sudden disappointment I felt in myself was unexpected but at the same time I'm glad I did the weigh-in. You see this is fuelling the want to lose weight, although I have to be patient as there isn't a chance of me losing weight over Christmas, I have to be even more prepared to lose weight when I begin properly in the New Year.

I guess even when we do try and watch what we eat we tend to fall on bad habits at the beginning but I can begin making small changes in my diet now before Christmas and before my new workout scheme for the New Year. I know it's going to be difficult and I'll have to fight every craving I have, but I have to stay strong.

As I'm going to be cutting fatty foods from my diet completely when I start the diet and workout scheme I know my mind will be craving it more than ever, I just have to think straight and carry on heading in the right direction.

I can't promise that I wont have a relapse, I am expecting one or two, but no more than that as I don't want to fall back into bad habits.

Wish me luck.

My Fitness Pal App.

That App.

 Yes I have an app that I have become somewhat dependant on now, it's called Myfitnesspal and it's one of the apps that you have to use everyday, it records all the food, exercise and water you consume among other things, I have been working on it for a little while now and it's helped me in a way I never realised.

It's show me the light about how I am eating and what I should seriously stop doing, it has become a nasty habit that I eat late at night and find myself snacking outside of the fridge at 2 am, no wonder I've found myself getting fatter. It's been my own misfortune, and my own fault.

But this is why I want more support and friends, so if your on this app and you want someone to help motivate you and be a pal, that is what I am here to do. We all need support especially when it comes to losing weight which can be one of the most difficult tasks to do.

I have decided as well that it isn't until the first Monday of the New Year that I'll be dedicating myself fully to losing a serious amount of weight, I shall be aiming to go gym three times a week, and eating healthy food. I am allowing myself some junk food, only the smallest amount, one square of dark chocolate a day if needed. But otherwise that's it, say goodbye to junk food and hello beautiful water and healthy food.

I am also going to be trying to cut down on my carbohydrate intake as that was the one thing I noticed most when checking through my diary on Myfitnesspal, and a little bit of wonderful news my boyfriend is finally giving me the support I need, he has also been gaining weight personally I think it's because we're in a relationship and we're both quite lazy people which hasn't helped us in any way, so now he's participating in the losing weight and logging all his food happens on Myfitnesspal which may be a bit of support that I'll need to make myself a better person who I know I'll prefer.

Then of course you have the fact that it'll improve our relationship in so many ways. I just hope you can all stick with me through this rather difficult phase and enjoy the ride as both me and Lewis do our best to lose weight and improve our physical fitness.

If you can't get the app then don't worry as they have a website as well, and here is my profile:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/elliejohns

Lacking Support.

We all have those times where we need support, more than we thought we would when we started. I am having one of those moments. I have always struggled with getting support in the right places.

For example: I desperately need support from my boyfriend to be able to lose the weight and to change myself the way I so badly need to, yet when I turn to him in my time of need I am faced with nothing but comments that don't help me in any way but cause confrontations in our relationship.

Not the kind of response you'd expect from a supposed love one.

I guess I'm hoping more than anything that'll I'll get the support I so desperately need here where people can relate to the need and want to be skinny and healthy and be a better person than I am now.

Failing To Keep Track.

Those Distractions...

We all get those times where we want to dedicate ourselves to something but then suddenly BOOM your life finally gets exciting and everything starts happening all at once. I mean these past few weeks have been quite stressful as it is but they have just been getting even more stressful.

I have barely been able to get track of myself let alone everything else that's happening in my life.

Although, Part one of my project is finished at college which is amazing, now all we have to do is the hard part which is setting up for our presentation. We have to present in front of a real client and hopefully win the competition which I can only hope will go well.

As you can in these photo's I have my second-in-command Shauna who is one of my best friends and one of those people who has an amazing metabolism so she can stuff her face. I am very jealous of this, but she makes up for it in motivating me to lose weight which is great because barely any of my friends agree with my decision even if it does make me happier.

Usually they say 'You don't have to lose weight, you look fine,' which I don't. I'm short so the weight is more noticeable and it makes me look horrendous, I won't wear a swimming costume not with the way I look in one. My thighs scrapping together and mu stretch-marks smothering my body, no thanks. No one deserves to see that, even if they were okay with it.

Either way I've been distracted with a lot of work and a lot of college stuff mainly, although I have been able to keep track of my eating habits and one thing has become very clear to me I don't actually have a steady diet. Not in the slightest, one moment I'm eating too much and then next I'm barely eating anything and my times are all over the place which makes it even worse.

 On the other hand at least I've been keeping myself busy now all I have to do is get myself into a routine and then I can start to organise myself properly. I have set myself a goal on Nike+ to start running at least 2 times a week for 3 weeks which I can only hope will to to plan!

Wish me luck everyone.

I think I'll need it.